About my performance review

I know I'm tired, because I typed the title of this post, and then hit publish. It doesn't need words to be understood. It'll work great.

We're doing a cookout, which I'll talk about later, and I have been awake for... 17 hours now. Slightly fuzzy at this point.

Any-hoo.

I've been due for a performance review (my very first, ever) for about a month now. The deadline is approaching, and my boss mentioned it to me again today. We're both still here for a few more hours, and I asked if he wanted to go ahead and do it now, since I will be out the rest of the week. (Vacation, hallelujah!)

He said we'd just wait until I got back, and he wasn't going to start inputting them into the system we're supposed to use until Friday. He said it was mostly positive anyway, so he wasn't worried about it.

Can you tell what word my brain stalled on? If you guessed 'mostly,' you'd be right. I was trying to puzzle that one out, and figure out where I'd gone wrong, and he continued that he couldn't think of anything negative to put.

Whew. Not that it would be bad to have something to improve on, but I wasn't sure what area that improvement would come from, since I haven't had any feedback suggesting otherwise.

There's a worry solved, at least.

And I think that's all for me today, because when I'm this tired, my brain starts to spiral off in truly strange directions. For example, I'm proof reading this before I hit publish for the version with the words in, and all of a sudden, my brain decides to inform me that heffalump is a weird word.

Ok then. 

A question for the audience

Is 10:40 on a Monday morning too early to turn to drink? Asking for myself.

It's a small town

The lady from the local newspaper just called me (not the paper I worked for) and asked for Marvin's hire date. I was really confused, because I wasn't sure what that had to do with anything.

She then said it was for [Retirement Company] which was even weirder.

Then I remembered that her husband, also named Marvin, works here.

She's also apparently my neighbor.

It's a very, very small town.

Dumber than an box of rocks

I am going to say some not very nice things about someone, but this is all anonymous, and I'm sorry, but it's true.

It's also the same employee as this post, which will probably surprise no one.

I am in charge of the badge software that lets people in the doors. I now have a badge printer, and I make new ones on site, instead of sending off for them. They are standard RFID badges. My conversation(s) with this employee went something like this.

Employee: I need a new badge, mine has quit working.
Bee's: Ok. I need to get your picture so I can print you a new one. I don't have time right now, but I will get it for you sometime this afternoon.
EE: how long do they take to come in?
B: I print them on site now.
EE: Oh, ok.

Later that afternoon -
EE: Do you know when my new badge will be here?
B: I have to take your picture first. I print them here.
EE: Oh. I don't have time for you to take my picture right now, I'm about to leave. 

The next day -
EE: Is my badge coming in soon?
B: [Internal screaming] Let me take your picture and I will get it for you right now. I print them here.
EE: Oh, you do? I didn't know that. You know, they only last about six months. Then the little numbers start to come off the back and they quit working.
B: [Not sure why I'm trying, but why not] No, there's actually a computer chip in them. You probably just brush up against a magnet or something.
EE: It doesn't scan the numbers?
B: [You mean where there is no scanner on the door or barcode to scan?] Nope. It doesn't.
EE: What about that.

Not resorting to physical violence

After my barely coherent midnight ramblings in this post, I drove the half an hour back to work. It was cranking on one in the morning, I had worked all day Friday, and I was tired. The kind of tired where you turn the radio and the air conditioning both up, because you don't want to fall asleep tired. The maybe you shouldn't be driving tired.

I am proud of myself though. When the twerp at the restaurant told me I would have to wait until the next day to order for the next day, even though I was standing right there, did I smash his head into the countertop? I did not. I also didn't get to say what I would have had I been a little more with it, which is, "I would like to order now." Instead, I got to make sure I ordered on Saturday for the nasty smelly food that I can't seem to cleanse from the air in my car.

When I finally got back to work, I loaded it all onto a cart and rolled it back to the department on third shift. Who had all been to sleep fairly recently. The supervisor, Ephraim, came in, and politely asked if I was going to stay and eat. I said no, that I wanted to go home and get to bed. I then made an offhand comment about getting to do that twice tomorrow.

Well. Then Ephraim just grinned, and very sarcastically said, "Yeah, your job is so hard." And did I punch him in the throat? No. I just smiled, told them to enjoy their food, and left.

That just, as we Southerners say, burns my biscuits. Am I out on the floor working? No. And they work hard out there, I won't argue with that. But I work hard too, and just because I'm not out on the floor doesn't mean I'm not working. Also, they all make easily twice what I do. The supervisor probably makes 2.5 times more than me. And I work longer hours than he does. It made me so mad I could have spit.

From my house, to the restaurant, to work, back to my house is a two hour round trip. And I did it three times with no complaint to anyone except my mother, who doesn't count.

When I got back to my office, I did give myself thirty seconds to contemplate quitting my job. It was late, and no one was in the office. I thought about what belongs to me personally in my office (shockingly little) and how long it would take to get to my car (not long at all). I have a key to my boss's office, so I thought I could just write down my passwords and a couple of other relevant pieces of information. Leave my keys and my ID badge on the desk. And just peace out. No one would know until Monday. My boss would have been at my door, but I didn't plan that far. It was a very pleasant thirty seconds.

Then I went home, got some sleep, and turned around and made two more trips to get food, both of which were less eventful than the first. I even had two whole people (one per crew) say thank you. I feel so appreciated.

I'm sorry, what?

One of the janitors just went past my office with what I am fairly certain was a false mustache on his face. That is all.

They don't pay me enough for this

It is 12:08 a.m. and I am in the parking lot of a restaurant chain that sells wings and is open at this forsaken hour.

I overestimated how long it would take me to get here from home, where I should be now. Instead of out on Friday the 13th with a full moon. Oh, it isn't Friday anymore. Its Saturday. Because I am out late to pick up food for people that will be mad I did not get enough sauces. I am not supposed to pick up the food till 12:30, so it's the parking lot for me. The restaurant smells weird.

They don't pay me enough for this. If I could've paid over the phone, I wouldn't be in this mess. Someone who makes three times what I make could have come instead. But no. Let's drag Bees out of bed to do it. Great plan. I wasn't in bed, because I know me, and I would not have gotten back up. 

This is a little more... frank than I usually am, but it is late and I am tired.